j o y

Christians have to fight for joy. 

That's such a backwards concept! You wouldn't think that in the battle there is joy, or while you are joyful you are also fighting. But this is the life of a person who follows Christ!

These past couple weeks the Lord has been teaching me to experience His joy even when circumstances are less than joyful. In my own heart, God has gently been showing me things I need to surrender in my life. And like the stubborn child I am, I tried telling God different reasons why I don't need to completely give these things up. 

I told myself 

I'm strong enough,

I'm satisfied enough,

I'm happy enough.

I was saying these things so much that I wasn't grasping more of Jesus. I was telling myself the amount of Jesus I had in my life was enough. I could hold onto these things while still "following" the Lord and everything would be alright. 

But you know what?

I lost all sense of joy. 

I was trying to do this all on my own, 

& I lost the fight. 

This is where I was a few weeks ago. Although I was still spending time with the Lord in prayer and the Word, I felt like I was stuck. 

I cried out to my Father, where are you? You say You'll never leave me, nor forsake me, yet I cannot understand why I feel so empty. I need you to fill me up! 

And that's when He spoke so gently, so sweetly, and so strongly into my heart. 

He said,

Beloved, I am right here! But you have placed these things between us. If you want to be closer with me, then you need to give them up. 

You need to choose what is more important. These relationships, things and ways you spend your time, or Me?

The moment God spoke these things to me, I was amazed at how free I felt. The peace of God truly does surpass all understanding! Let me tell you, surrendering is not easy. And it's something my flesh absolutely hates. At times during these past weeks, I have felt that maybe through surrendering these things I'll be missing out on them. I definitely feel a loss, because now the way I spend my days and the people I spend my time with might be very different. Honestly, my heart hurts over that. The enemy so quickly wants to use that to discourage me. And that's where the fight for joy comes in! 

Through this process of surrender, I have had to press into Jesus. I have spent so much more time simply being in His presence because He truly is the Comforter of the lonely, the Mender of the brokenhearted and the Healer of the hurting. If I had not experienced these feelings of loss or sadness, I never would have been able to experience the Father in these ways! If my life was constant happiness and good thing after good thing, how would I get to experience every single part of the Father's heart? 

So now I can happily tell you, my heart is rejoicing greatly! My God is good. He is so good. Waking up every morning and getting to immediately talk to Jesus is a blessing beyond comprehension. 

I get to draw close to his heart when the enemy using words like 

You aren't good enough,

You'll never be worth anything,

You're unwanted here.

Instead my Father tells me words like

You are good enough for me,

In Christ you have worth beyond measure,

You are wanted in my kingdom and I sent my only Son to die for you to ensure you would be my daughter. 

And friends, let me tell you, I would rather have a life of sorrowful circumstances while understanding and experience more of God's heart, than a life of happiness only touching the surface of Who He is. 

Friends, God is alive and beyond active in the lives of those who call upon His name! He is constantly beckoning us, but sometimes we are hard of hearing because we have blocked our ears. If you feel like God is faraway and not working in your life right now, can I encourage you to ask God to show you what needs to go in your life? Maybe it's simply more purposeful time spent with Him in prayer. Maybe there are things you need to literally remove from your life. Maybe the way you spend your time could be rearranged to better glorify the Lord. Maybe you simply just need to run back into His arms and rest. 

Whatever it is, I promise you, God is there and ready to embrace you!

If the circumstances surrounding your life seem to be blocking out the hope, can I encourage you to press into the heart of the Father? This life offers hurt and pain, but God offers unending life, joy and comfort. 

He loves you.

He knows you by name.

He is constantly beckoning you to His side

He is more than enough for you. 

"Fear not, for you will not be ashamed; be not confounded, for you will not be disgraced; for you will forget the shame of your youth, and the reproach of your widowhood you will remember no more. For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is his name; and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer, the God of the whole earth he is called. For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed, but my steadfast love shall not depart from you, and my covenant of peace shall not be removed," says the Lord, who has compassion on you.

{ Isaiah 54:4-6, 10}

r e t u r n i n g

It all seems like a dream.

To be back in Ethiopia, to see the beautiful people of Burayu again, to be a part of God's work here. 

I feel so unworthy to have this incredible honor. 

When we arrived in Addis Ababa on Saturday afternoon, I couldn't wipe the smile off my face!

God kept whispering to my heart "Beloved, we're here! We're here!" 

Walking out of the airport I was flooded with memories from last year! The smells, the sounds, the people were all reminding me, I am home. 

Saturday afternoon, the three other people on my team and I traveled by van through the crowded streets of Burayu to the Full Gospel Church. My heart sang as we walked up the small hill to the beautiful church building. 

Little by little, I began to see children popping out of nowhere and I felt their curious stares. Many of these children have never seen a white person before! I returned the stares by walking over to them and introducing myself while giving them a small piece of candy. Watching their little faces light up will never get old to me!

The rest of the day was spent looking around the new school buildings and discussing with some church leaders how we can be a blessing to the community this week. I was also encouraged to meet many people who are attending Small Group leadership training under a Real Life Ministries director from Post Falls! These people are serious about loving Jesus and making more disciples for Him. One member told me "The moment the church stops making disciples is the moment we have a problem. We will always focus on making disciples."

I went to bed that night so unbelievably thankful, excited to wake up in my favorite country. I woke up at 4:30 to the sound of the Muslims praying and the Orthodox call to the Mosques. My heart breaks for these people stuck in this unfulfilling, traditional religion that offers no hope for eternal life. 

My team and I were greeted at the hotel by Pastor Emmanuel, who took us to get macchiatos (the greatest espresso ever!) and then to church. 

Oh, church! The moment I had been waiting for! 

When the van pulled up in front of the church building, I began to see people I know and I could not contain my excitement! I ran up the hill and gave a big bear hug to my brother and friend, Dinka. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the one person I had been anticipating seeing the most. 

My "daughter" Lidiya was running down the hill to meet me! I quickly ran to her and she jumped into my waiting arms. She was squeezing my neck so tightly with her tiny little hug that I could hardly breathe. We were both laughing and crying, my heart was beating so fast. I kept giving her kisses and telling her "Owendishalo" which means I love you. She kissed me back and could not stop giggling. She would not let go of my arms...and that's just the way I wanted it. 

I looked up and saw all the other children quickly gathering around, eager to greet the American visitors. Within seconds I had at least twenty kids around me grabbing my arms, shirt, skirt and stroking my blonde hair. I could not stop smiling as tears of joy rolled down my face! 

Church was a blessing as always, I just cherish the time worshipping together with my Ethiopian family. Their warm hospitality is unbelievable. After the service was over it was a joyful reunion, as members of the congregation I spent time with last year, quickly made their way to me to give me tight hugs and many, many kisses on the cheek. I have never known a greater joy than being united with people through our love for Jesus. And I love Jesus even more because of this. 

We met with the elders of the church afterwards and discussed the plans for the rest of the week, families we need to see and children we want to interview for new sponsorships. After this we all went to visit two young girls who are part of the sponsorship program. Seena had a tumor removed from her neck about two years ago, and is now suffering from very poor eyesight and can barely walk. We brought her and her family enough food to last a couple of weeks and we will return to take her to a medical clinic. 

I have to be honest, it is always really overwhelming for me to walk into the homes of these people. The poverty is indescribable and the living conditions are horrible. I had to catch my breathe walking into this home to keep from gagging, the smell was so bad. I always walk away from these homes feeling utterly helpless. I so desperately want to help all of these families and give them every good thing that I possibly can! I was thankful we were able to bring them food for the next couple of weeks, but I wonder what they will eat when that food is gone. 

Sometimes helping just one person at a time, in the midst of this horrible poverty, feels like you're emptying the ocean with an eyedropper. Every child I see without a parent, every boy without a father, every girl who is already taking care of the family, just draws me into the arms of my Father. Without Jesus, I would not be able to go into another mud home. Without Jesus, I would not be able to keep a smile on my face instead of breaking down in tears every minute. Without Jesus, I would not have any hope. But Praise God that He offers all these things and more! 

As we begin our week tomorrow, please pray that our team would simply be loving God and loving his people. We want to be open to do the will of our Father and do mighty things because we serve a Mighty God. Pray for the people who will be receiving the gospel throughout the week. And please pray that much would get accomplished in the short time that we are here. 

Thank you so much for your support, prayers and encouragement friends! It means more than you'll ever know. Be encouraged in the hope we have in Christ Jesus! 

- Audrey

j e a l o u s

Wow, it's been a long time since I've written on here! Sorry for being so MIA friends. 

God has been teaching me so much this last month. Sitting here and reflecting back on how good and faithful He is, even in the disappointing times, just strengthens my faith in how well God will always provide for me. 

Thank you for your prayers about the Sunday night Bible study. I am always blown away each week as I see God working in the lives of the Ticos. It's been a blessing watching some of them come to a new understanding of God's salvation and walk into a new relationship with Him. I've witnessed the power of prayer and how amazing it is to intercede on the behalf of other people. God truly does answer prayer and I believe He honors it when His children faithfully gather before Him and seek His guidance. 

One of the biggest things God taught me this past month was how deeply He truly loves me and how jealous He is for all of me. During our spring break, we all went up the coast to Manuel Antonio and Jaco to have a fun couple days hiking, swimming in the ocean, feeding crocodiles and finding precious little sloths. The first day we were there I ended up losing my iPhone, which I didn't even realize was missing until a couple hours into our adventure. I was bummed because of all the pictures I have on it that I lost (I'm a bit of a picture/Instagram fanatic). Right as I realized my phone was gone, I remembered something I had promised the Lord over a year ago. I was totally blessed by having an iPhone and never expected to even own one. I told God that I never wanted to let an object as silly as a phone come between my relationship with Him or any other people. 

And, wouldn't ya know it, God gave me a chance to see if I was serious about that promise. 

I knew I could get angry for asking another person to take care of my phone and they lost it. I could allow my frustration to ruin the rest of the trip. But I couldn't! Because the Holy Spirit would not let me forget about the promise I made to Him so long ago. I'm so glad God doesn't forget, even though we might! 

The next morning I got up early and left the church where we were staying and started walking down the street to find a local coffee shop. I remember actually  praying out loud as I walked down the street...I must've looked so crazy to the Ticos watching me haha. I was tired from a night of no sleep, I had spider bites all over me, a bad sunburn, a bruised heel and no phone. I told God "Okay, you have my complete attention right now...what are you trying to tell me?!"

And I will never forget the words He told me next. 

He spoke so gently into my heart and said "Don't you see how much I want all of you?" And I was completely speechless at that moment. All of a sudden the tired and frustrated feelings I had completely were covered by the ocean of love I felt from my heavenly Father. How loved am I?! God wants all of me so much that He allowed my phone to be lost. Even if I was only spending an hour on my phone everyday, that was an hour that God wants. From me! Who am I that the Almighty Creator of the Universe would want all of my attention, all of my devotion? But that is what He longs for! Oh, I think of how much His heart must break because I know we all fail at this every day. 

Can I encourage you today friends? Stop what you're doing right now and go spend some time with Jesus. Don't even finish reading my blog! Please! Just go and sit on your knees before the One who desires all of you. I can tell you that I have found such peace and comfort in His arms and I know I still have such a long way to go in loving Him more. 

Just seek Jesus. The way that you know God will translate the way you live your life. Simply draw close to Jesus, commit your ways to Him and trust that He will act (Ps. 37:6) His love will carry you through whatever you're facing right now, beloved friends. 

Please continue to pray for the Study here and the new ticos that have started coming! Pray for the salvation of this people in this valley! Also, please pray that the students and staff here would finish out these last three weeks strongly. I'm amazed at how fast these past four months have gone and it will be bittersweet to leave my home here. 

Thank you for being such an encouragement to me and praying for me. I pray that you are encouraged in the rich love of Jesus Christ!

- aud

g o i n g

I love the way God works.

I'm blown away that God chooses to use weak and feeble humans to accomplish His purpose here on earth. I also marvel in the ways He chooses to accomplish these purposes. 

The crew here in San Isidro was incredibly blessed with the opportunity to travel to the Guaymí tribe in southern Costa Rica and share the good news of Christ. For weeks the students and staff prayed and sought the Lord while preparing skits, crafts, songs and games to play with the children of the tribe. It's so cool how God blesses us while we prepare to go do His work. A lot of times it was difficult to stay focused on what needed to be accomplished and continue to love everyone in the midst of it. But (i love that word when it comes to God working) everything came together, and last Wednesday seventeen of us left San Isidro to travel down to Panama and then back up to the Guaymí tribe. 

After a full day of traveling through the border and then through the mountains, we all crammed in a small shuttle bus and drove into the jungle. The farther we drove, the more excited I became! It was growing dark as I realized we really were in the dead center of the jungle. The trees grew thicker and the jungle noises grew louder. Getting dropped off, we all traveled over an perfectly sketchy bridge into our campsite. I went to bed with such excitement that night because I was so stocked to be camping out in the middle of the jungle! 

The next day was blessed as we started working on laying the foundation of a small house for the pastor of the church. Little by little during construction the precious faces of the Guaymí children began trickling into the church yard. It was so much fun to get to play with the few kids that were curious enough to come see us Gringos! The rest of the day involved playing in the river, construction and getting to know the village more. Because not many kids showed up the first day we weren't able to do a lot of the activities we had planned which was a bummer, but God looking back, totally God's plan :)

The second day we went hard on construction. Most of us worked on mixing and laying cement for all of the morning and most of the afternoon. It was a huge task that became difficult because of the extreme heat and the limited resources. We were constantly in need of water that had to be brought uphill from the river. But after a solid day of work, we laid the concrete for the house! After we all got to bathe in the river we arrived at the campsite along with a lot of the village kids! We had walked through the village the day before inviting kids to come the next day, and it was awesome to see most of them came and brought friends! We played games, painted faces, blew up balloons and played soccer with all the little guys. After awhile we gathered all the kids together and were able to sing songs with them and then perform the drama we had prepared. As we acted out the life of Jesus, the crucifixion and resurrection it was so cool to watch the kids faces. Their eyes were hooked on Jesus and were closely watching to see what would happen next. I think the coolest part of the drama was what we found out later on! Bart, the missionary who took us out to the Indians, told us that the way the Guaymí pass on stories from generations is exactly how we told them the gospel; they act it out while a narrator tells the story. 

How good is our God. 

We didn't know that at all going into this trip, the students just thought a drama would be a fun way to tell the kids about Jesus and His salvation. But the Lord knew how He wanted His gospel to be told to the children and their parents. 

Please pray for the seeds that got planted while we were there! The Guaymí are an unreached people group, with only 1% being Christian. In the village we were at there is Jehovah Witness, strong Catholicism and native religions. A new hospital is being built on the reservation and witch doctors will be kept there as a treatment option for the patients. The enemy has a strong hold on these beautiful people's hearts and minds. 

This trip opened my eyes up even more to the darkness of this world and how desperate the need is for the light of Christ to be shone, especially into the uttermost parts of the earth. Even in the middle of the jungle, God knows and loves every detail about these people He so carefully created. He desires their hearts just as much as He desires yours. The need for relationship is so greatly there! 

Dear brothers and sisters, please go! Go to the coffee shops. Go to the struggling girls and hurting guys. Go to your neighbors. Go to your workplace. Go unto all the nations. Please don't keep the love of Christ you have in you hidden away! Oh beloveds, the world around us is dying and we hold within us the remedy for everlasting life! Please don't let another day go by without seeing every single person around you as a soul with a destiny. 

Let's turn this world upside down and inside out in the name of Jesus Christ whose name is Redeemer, Forgiver, Lover, Sovereign, Compassion, Merciful and Friend. 

"[as you are going] therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

Matthew 28:19-20

Check out the Carty Family's website to learn more about the Guaymí and to see a gallery of photos from our time there! Thanks for your prayer  and encouragement friend, you mean so much to me. 

http://www.cartyfamily.org/calvary-chapel-bible-college-march-2013.html

-aud

rescued

If my heart is overwhelmed and I cannot hear Your voice
I’ll hold on to what is true though I cannot see
If the storms of life they come and the road ahead gets steep
I will lift these hands in faith
I will believe

I remind myself of all that You’ve done
And the life I have because Your Son

Love came down and rescued me
Love came down and set me free
I am Yours I am forever Yours
Mountain high or valley low
I sing out remind my soul
That I am Yours I am forever Yours

When my heart is filled with hope
and every promise comes my way
When I feel Your hands of grace rest upon me

Staying desperate for You God
Staying humbled at Your feet
I will lift these hands and praise
I will believe

I remind myself of all that You’ve done
And the life I have because Your Son

Love came down and rescued me
Love came down and set me free
I am Yours I am forever Yours
Mountain high or valley low
I sing out remind my soul
That I am Yours I am forever Yours

I am Yours
I am Yours
All my days
I am Yours

Love came down and rescued me
Love came down and set me free
I am Yours I am forever Yours
Mountain high or valley low
I sing out remind my soul
That I am Yours I am forever Yours

I am a very average musician; there is nothing special about me. But the way that God spoke to my heart through this song was extraordinary and I wanted to share it with you. Let the beautiful words of this song sink into your heart and penetrate your thoughts, words, actions and life! 

-aud

r e n e w

It's amazing to me that God knows what we need before we ourselves even realize we are lacking something. 

Yesterday the Holy Spirit refreshed me in a way that renewed my spirit and healed parts of my heart that I didn't even realize were broken!

I've shared with you all how frustrating the language barrier has been for me and how discouraging it is to be learning Spanish so slowly when I just want to talk to everyone I meet! Without realizing it, this last week I became intensely focused on this barrier in front of me. 

I also realized yesterday that I have been in Costa Rica for a month! I cannot believe how quickly the time has already gone and how much of a blessing this last month has been. I was hit with this sudden sense of urgency while walking home yesterday...I only have three more months to live in Costa Rica.

I do not want to waste my time here. 

As much as a blessing my new friends, family, culture and experiences are, I do not want them to become my main focus these next few months. My number one purpose for being in Bible College should be to grow in the knowledge of my Lord and Savior and drawing closer to Him every day! This should always be my focus. 

So fast-forward to yesterday afternoon. I'm reading through Numbers 13 (go check it out!!) and when I got to verse 27 my heart literally skipped a beat. My mind was moving a hundred miles an hour and I was immediately on my knees before the Lord. In this passage Moses sent 12 spies into Canaan to spy out the Promised Land. The men came back with giant grapes and a report of how the land was flowing with milk and honey. 

BUT (there's always a "but" with us humans, huh?) 

then the spies reported about the giant people and all the enemies that inhabited the land. The men had seen the promises of God, they knew He had called them to be in the land of Canaan, but they could only focus on the difficulties that they saw in front of them. 

They had forgotten the promises of God. 

And I found myself relating to this passage so deeply! The time I have God speak the clearest to me in my whole life was when He told me "Go to Costa Rica." And here I am! God told me to go, I followed, and now I just need to trust His promises that He will see me through this season of life. 

He knew there would be a language barrier.
He knew I was going to get frustrated.
He knows the plan He has for my life. 
He even knew that I would doubt this plan because I became so focused on the difficulties in front of me instead of the promises of His promises. 

Ha, I am such an Israelite!

The moment I realized this, I was simply overcome by the Holy Spirit. I don't know how else to describe it! I felt such a sense of peace, urgency and purpose in my heart. God's presence was so thick around me and for a moment I forgot that I was on my knees in my living room. All I could see was God's great love for me. 

You guys, this absolutely brought me to tears. 

God knew I needed to be renewed with a fresh anointing of His Spirit! I am so thankful to follow a God who intimately cares for the details of EVERY ONE of His children! Oh beloved friends, cry out to Jesus! Pour out your heart before Him! (Ps 62:8) He is so faithful to come upon His people when He hears His name on their tongues and hearts. 

If I can encourage you with one thing today, it's this:

Evaluate your focus. 

I realized that my focus was not on Jesus. It was on the obstacles in front of me! And the longer I focused on those, the less I could see the power of the Almighty God. Set your sights on the cross and the power that rose Jesus from the grave! God has given us His promises for a purpose...He knew there would be difficulties in our lives, so He made His promises even bigger than our problems. Cling to His promises that are all throughout His word and set your focus on His holy name that is Mighty to Save. 

I love you all and pray that God blesses and keeps you. May His face shine upon you and bring you peace. 

-aud

h o p e

Seriously, how great is the God that we serve? I am just blown away by His faithfulness and His promises that cause me to be a prisoner of hope. 

I read that phrase in Zechariah this morning,

"Return to your stronghold, O prisoners of hope;

today I declare that I will restore you to double."

{ zechariah 9:12 }

I had to stop and just think about that for awhile because it hit me so strongly! I am a prisoner of hope. 

God's promises are so perfectly true that I can be captured by them if I choose to place myself in His stronghold. And not only does He want to be my only refuge, but also He is offering me restoration inside this stronghold! 

I am just overwhelmed by You Jesus!

    So in Costa Rica updates, we have just finished our second week of classes and they are going great! I am really being blessed through the classes and all the different teachers. I'm always so amazed at how living and active the Word of God is! I'm also humbled after every single class because I realize how much I still have to learn about God's Word. He is so big and too marvelous for my tiny mind to ever fully comprehend! 

It's such a blessing getting to know the Ticos and continue to make our way around the town. Yesterday morning all the students and interns left the house at 6 am and we picked up trash at the bus stops in our neighborhood for a couple hours. It was so humbling but also really fun and eye-opening! We already stick out so much in this community, so we were especially obvious yesterday as we were picking up trash. I was laughing to myself thinking about how funny we must look to the Ticos...just a bunch of Americans picking up trash early in the morning must be so bizarre to them. 

But it's giving them something to think about for sure! I love how the school is working to make us known in the community, but not to be known for being Americans or white, but being known because of Jesus. 

Please continue to pray for divine appointments for all of us during this next week. God is continuing to bring new people to the Sunday night study, and last  week our Tico friend Anderson gave his life to the Lord! Hallelujah! God is so good! 

I love you all and thank God every time I remember you. Thank you for constantly encouraging me and blessing my heart. 

-aud

falling

I am blown away by God's sovereignty.

I mean, just sitting back to consider how perfect God's divine plan for each of our lives is brings me to my knees in complete worship. God intimately knows every single person on the planet better than they know themselves. He can speak to me in a way that no one else ever can. 

He has loved you more in a moment than other lovers could in a lifetime.

Whenever I get to go to someplace new I always find myself thinking about this overwhelming fact of God. There are so many people in the world, everyone has their own lives, own thoughts, own desires. And yet, God has the power to whisper into each one's heart and draw them closer to Himself. No one is too far away for His gentle touch to reach. Not even the drunk on the street I just passed. Not the prostitute on the street corners late at night. Not the business man driving through town. Not the Bible college student. 

We are all in the same desperate need of Christ and the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit. 

I have been in Costa Rica for almost a week now and I am falling....falling in love with the people, the culture and the way of life. Everyone is so friendly and  easy-going. I speak very little and broken Spanish, but everyone I have talked to is so gracious and helps me through my poor sentences. 

As kind as the people are here, there is still such a great need for the redeeming power of Jesus Christ. This area is run by tradition, which can sometimes lead to hardened or uninterested hearts. Everyone here knows about Jesus Christ because Catholicism is the main religion. Helping the Ticos (locals) to understand the difference between the old religion and Christ's freeing salvation is difficult. But my heart has been so encouraged to meet some of the believers in the area! We host a Sunday Bible study for the community at the school and many Ticos came to hear the living Word of God. We worshipped, fellowshipped and laughed late into the night. I love my new brothers and sisters in Christ. God is doing a great work here! The Holy Spirit keeps reminding me of Isaiah 55:8-9:

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. for as high as the heavens are above the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. 

Everything the Lord does is completely perfect in it's own time. So I am just praising His holy name because of what He has done, what He is doing and what He will continue to do in San Isidro. He is so worthy of all glory, honor and praise and I pray that my life is a reflection of this. 

Dear brothers and sisters, seek after Jesus! Oh He is so sweet and beautiful and we have only seen a glimpse of His goodness! I am so thankful that He has forgiven my ugly sins and removed the burden of guilt from my shoulders and replaced it with joy that is new every morning! Please pray that through the students and staff at CCBC the community of San Isidro would also come to know Christ's peace that surpasses all understanding.

Thank you so much for your prayers, encouragement and support. 

Pura Vida!

-aud

We're here!

Wow!

It has been a crazy past two days, so I am thoroughly enjoying this moment of stillness. I’m sitting in my new apartment with the windows open, feeling the afternoon breeze gently come through. I hear the birds squawking to each other, the occasional conversation in Spanish and the distant noise of car engines.

This culture is so colorful, bright and easygoing. I cannot even tell you how much I am falling in love with Costa Rica!

This morning everyone (staff, interns, their families, students) met for breakfast family style. It is great getting to know everyone and hearing how God brought them to Costa Rica. Everyone is so encouraging and ready to serve in whatever way God asks them to. 

After breakfast we had the rest of the day to go exploring the town! After unpacking, we went grocery shopping for the week. This was so much fun and challenging, mainly because of the language barrier. We spent close to an hour wandering around, reading labels, repeating words in Spanish and figuring out the conversion rates. We finished this small adventure with groceries for the week and a better understanding of everyday life here in San Isidro. 

After lunch all the girls took a trip to...where else? The mall! We wandered around, looking through all the stores and the merchandise. There was a small ice cream shop where we all got cones and tried out more of our Spanish on the employees there. I'm so thankful that the people here are so laid back that they want to help you with Spanish instead of being impatient with us. 

We took the bus back home and enjoyed a quiet afternoon in our apartments. Jill and I decided to make dinner together and we were quiet proud of ourselves when we had finished making a nice spaghetti dinner with our limited resources. Did I hear someone say P31? ;)

Our first day in Costa Rica was finished off by a great worship time. We sung out praises to the only God who is worthy, late into the evening. I am just so thankful to be here with my new brothers and sisters, all sharing one heart that longs to worship and serve our Father. It is truly a blessing to be here and I cannot wait to see what this new day holds. 

Adios mi amigos! 

b e g i n n i n g s

"Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." // psalm 37:4

This verse has always intrigued me. I've heard it used in so many different ways by many different people. 

"There won't be blessings in your life until you are truly following the Lord."

"Once I love Jesus enough, THEN He will bring me my husband/wife."

"I must not be following God good enough because I don't have ____."

"Loving God = me getting tons of really cool blessings."

But I struggle to believe any of those things to be true. I don't think that God is a magic genie or a Father who will be manipulated. I also don't think that blessings always have material forms. 

1 john 3:1 says "See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are." God is the most loving, faithful and generous Father there ever could be. He longs to lavish His love onto His children if we would only pause to realize the depth of His affection for us. 

The moment I taste and see the goodness of the Lord, I want more. His love satisfies so completely that I am beginning to learn that He is truly all I ever will need. I've noticed that the more I delight myself in the Lord's love, He begins to change the desires of my heart. I used to think all I ever wanted was to get married and have a family. Although those aren't bad things to desire, God was  moving my heart in a different direction. Over the course of 2012, the desire of my heart became one word. 

 go. 

I've been blown away with how deeply the Lord has placed this desire in my heart. In the course of a year, He allowed me to go to Denver and Ethiopia on mission trips and attend Bible College in Southern California. I never expected these blessings to be a part of my life. Missions has changed my outlook on life and molded what I want to be when "I grow up". 

Last September, during a missions presentation on Costa Rica at my school, I felt God telling me, so clearly, "Go to Costa Rica". I sat in my seat, stunned, because I had never heard God's voice so clearly before. Over the course of two weeks, God confirmed this over and over again through different situations. 

And so, I'm moving to Costa Rica next week. Ha, that sounds so weird to say!

I'm going through Calvary Chapel Bible College and will be living at the teaching site in San Isidro with about ten other students. While taking classes centered around missions and evangelism, we will also be doing hands on missions work! I am so excited for this part!! 

We will be working in two different orphanages, facilitating a Sunday night church that anyone from the community is welcome to join, taking backpacking trips into the mountains to tell unreached people about Jesus, and most importantly, being an example to the community of the saving grace of Christ.

This is going to be one of the biggest adventures of my life, and I stand in awe that God is allowing me to go. It is incredibly humbling. 

I'm sitting here, just reflecting on the goodness of the Lord and how faithful He is to keep His promise. Delighting myself in the Lord led to Him gently molding my heart to be more like His. This is only the beginning and I am nowhere near perfect at this. I still fail to bring all my worries and problems before the Lord. I forget to place time with Him as my number one priority. I still give into the temptations of my flesh and forget to let the Lord fight those battles. 

But, beloved friends, God is faithful! He has turned my wretched, broken heart into an instrument that longs to praise and serve Him. I am so in love with the Savior of my soul! 

So this simple blog is just a way for me to communicate to you what God is doing in my heart these next few months. The wandering that I am doing with Jesus. Not because I am anything important, but because God is the most important person of all and His faithfulness deserves to be repeated. 

All the glory goes to God! 

-aud